Radomir frightens a deer
“I can only stay for a little while today my love”, Radomir said congenially as he carefully sat on the edge of the bed, “If you are lonely I can ask one of the women to come and sit with you”.
It had only been in these last few weeks that he had finally gotten the courage to lie on the bed beside his wife again. He didn’t know what was wrong with him. He had the right to demand whatever he asked of her and yet he wanted to wait. What he wanted was for her to want him, but he might as well have waited forever. So finally, one day he had crept onto the bed and sat beside her. She had turned to look at him with her blank, glazed eyes but she had not protested.
It had been a few more days and he had slid across the bed, his body lying close to hers so that he could feel the heat of her fevered body pressing lightly against his side.
“Are you feeling any better today my dearest”, he asked with a brave smile knowing that he could not expect an answer but desperate to break the silence somehow. His voice sounded deep and commanding in his ears, not as gentle as he had wanted.
“I am feeling a little sick”, she replied softly, turning towards him.
His heart gave a surge of joy, his hands beginning to tremble. Her mouth was drooping sadly at the corners, her eyes staring blearily at him. But still she had answered him!
She must finally be getting better. Not only that but she did look a little better. She was finally beginning to eat again properly, gaining some weight which Goodwife Cade said was a very good sign. Her arms looked round again, so that he longed to squeeze them between his meaty hands. He could see the soft curve of her belly beneath her gown where before there had been only a concave hollow.
And she was looking at him, her eyes searchingly gazing into his own as though trying to determine what lay behind them. For the moment they seemed clear again, the haze of fever departing. He could see there was even some colour returning to her cheeks and it did not resemble the flushed red of the long nights where she had writhed in the depths of the fever.
He carefully slid his heavy body across the bed, inch by inch.
“Don’t you frighten her then” his mother’s voice whispered in his ear as they crept towards the baby deer. It was staring at him with wide dewy eyes, its gangly legs shivering, ready to take flight at any moment. Still they had crept ever close, his mother’s warm hand in his, his clumsy feet struggling to tread lightly, the leaves crackling ominously beneath them. “Let’s stop here”, she had said, but he had wanted to get closer, he was not satisfied with just watching. He wanted to touch it, to feel its soft fur beneath his hand, to feel its trembling subside under his firm strokes. He had pushed on ahead until a twig had cracked in half beneath one misplaced step and the deer had bolted hysterically into the trees.
“Can I come a little closer”, he whispered softly, but his voice was rasping in his ears, grating from somewhere on the back of his palate. He was trying to smile but he felt his ugly wide mouth curving into a sneer.
“Yes”, she breathed, a faint wheeze coming between her chattering teeth, her eyes wide and frightened.
He could see that her legs were trembling, beneath her gown.
He put his arm around her frail shoulders, pulling her body against his chest. He wrapped his thick fingers around her arm, feeling the round softness of it. God how he wanted her. It had been so very, very long. He gently kissed her face, his lips trailing down her cheek searching for her mouth. He kissed the very corner of her sad, drooping lips, reaching for her, but then she turned her face from his, her body squirming away.
He caught her firmly in his arms pulling her sharply towards him, pressing his hot wet mouth against hers. She shuddered for a moment and then froze, completely still as his lips tried to prise hers open, his tongue thrusting into an unyielding mouth. She did not move, her lips hanging open, her tongue limply retreating somewhere far back inside her mouth so that when he brushed against it, it was like touching something freshly dead.
He pulled back from her, her eyes staring blankly at his face, the life he had seen in them moments before drizzling away. Her lips were pursed so tightly they were beginning to turn white, her whole body sagging, shrinking away from his massive form.
He had done it again, stumbled onwards ever closer until what he wanted most had scrabbled desperately away from his grasping embrace.
“I should be going”, he choked, pushing himself hurriedly from the bed as she subsided into her usual position, her face blank, her hands clasped atop her stomach.
He opened the door and strode out.
He found he was not alone in the corridor. One of the guards was talking to the steward’s sister. His muscular body was looming above her as she shrank towards the wall her shoulders hunched, arms wrapped protectively around her slender waist.
“I’m really so sorry for what yew saw Lyiss”, the guard was saying, his body leaning closer as her’s flattened against the damp, swollen boards.
She was mumbling something Radomir couldn’t hear, her lips barely moving. Her mud-coloured eyes were wide and frightened, her face so pale he could see every freckle standing out.
All he could see of the guard were his broad shoulders, blocking out the young girl’s body and the grim set of his unshaven jawline.
It was obvious to him that this man was threatening the young woman somehow and it was certainly no way to behave to the sister of the King’s steward. He drew himself up to his full height, pulling his recently slumping shoulders back, setting his face into a scowl.
“What is going on here?”, he boomed.
The guard jumped startled, turning away from the girl to stare at Radomir.
“Oh… oh… nothing Yer Lordship. I was just apologising to Lyiss here for something”.
Radomir recognised him as the guard that had been injured… Hildfirth or something like it. His handsome face was marred by ugly ragged gashes zigzagging across it.
“Cornering her alone in the corridor doesn’t make it seem like the most noble of apologies. And I am not sure she is appreciating your kind words. Perhaps your actions would speak louder and you should leave her alone”.
The guard stared at him insolently, folding his arms. His face twisted into an ugly grimace, the pattern of his scars changing shape with his expression.
“Well perhaps yew should ask her what she thinks Yer Lordship, rather than sticking yer nose where it doesn’t belong”, he retorted angrily, “What do yew care anyway?”
Radomir felt the rage bubbling up inside like molten lava, threatening to burst explosively from him in the form of his fist connecting with this upstart’s nose.
He took some rapid deep breaths to try and control himself and not frighten the poor girl more than she already was. He could see her trembling from the corner of his eyes, her fingers shaking at the end of stick-like arms.
“I care because you are obviously harassing this lady with unwanted attention and she deserves better than to be hounded by an unwashed, scarred nobody like you!”
The smirk slid off the guards face like cow’s hoof jelly on a tilted plate, the skin around his scars puckering. His shoulders drooping dejectedly.
“Begging yer pardon Yer Lordship, my temper was getting the best of me”, he turned quickly to Lyiss his eyes not meeting hers, “I am very sorry”.
Then he turned on his heel and left.
Radomir was left standing alone in the corridor with Lyiss. She was staring up at him, her eyes wide and frightened, her lips pursed so tightly they were almost white. Her face was beginning to blush a furious red that hid even the darkest of her freckles and was stretching all the way down inside her bodice. The nostrils of her wide nose were flared very slightly as she sucked air in through them, not daring to open her mouth. Strands of her long, lank hair slid slowly down around her face. He stared into her eyes, noticed the golden flecks amongst the brown, like autumn leaves trampled into the mud by heavy feet.
He tried to smile kindly at her, but the corners of his mouth felt uncomfortable so that he wondered if his expression was not more a leer.
“Was he bothering you Mistress Elmvarn?”, he asked, “I can make sure it doesn’t happen again”.
She shook her head slowly, all the while staring at him, her eyes never leaving his.
Her shoulders were hunched, the entire length of her body pressing up against the wall as though she were trying to disappear into it. He recognised the action, she was trying to make herself as small as possible so as not to appear a target.
He suddenly realised he too was looming over her, his bulky body thoughtlessly leaning towards her frail one as the guard’s had.
He hurriedly stepped back, giving her some space, unable to hide his dismay.
He knew she had seen it too, her eyes were fixed on his face, watching his features curiously. He felt uncomfortable under such scrutiny, like he wanted to open the nearest door and run from her. Then he remembered his wife was waiting on the other side and her blank stare would sear his soul even deeper.
“Thank you My Lord”, she murmured, detaching herself from the wall and hurried off down the hallway, her skirts swishing around her long thin legs.
He watched as she left, her thin arms swinging awkwardly at her sides, one little, pink ear peeking out from beneath her hair.
Oh, Radomir, just take your time! She was so close! (And Verity, don’t even say “Oh she was thinking about something else and didn’t notice it was him at first.”) This can work out! *frets*
That was quite remarkable the way he noticed Lyiss was frightened. (Unless he misinterpreted a girl being coy, but even that would be remarkable, I think, since one would expect the opposite error from a guy like Radmoir.) But whoa! way to miss the beam in your own eye, my brother! I hope he goes and thinks about this. At least he does seem to have made the deer/Valeriya comparison all on his own, which looks like real progress.
I am know I am Radomir’s biggest fan so I will stop gushing now. So unfortunate about Kelgar being too forward with Lyiss, though. They would be so cute together. I would love a longer chapter with the two of them together. Maybe he is just super-awkward now. Don’t make Kelgar be Radomir II, Verity! And don’t even make that last bit be some kind of Radomir-rapes-Lyiss foreshadowing! *frets*
Dude if Radomir rapes Lyiss I will personally turn myself into a sim character, climb into your story, and rip his balls off like a paper towel.
Verity, between your writing and Lothere’s undaunted loyalty to Radomir, I’m really finding myself hoping that he’ll turn out all right.
And, man, today isn’t Lyiss’s day!
Okay, first… Tiana? Your comment made me laugh so hard I CRIED. HAHAHA!
Anyway, ahem, onto the actual story. I do not get Radomir. At all. It’s like… he’s done this complete turnaround… yet I don’t see how/why/what. I dunno. I don’t trust him. It just seems… too convenient. There’s something sketchy about a HUGE leap in change there.
As for the scene with Lyiss and Kelgar… yay!
Okay… first of all Tiana… I should so not read your comments when I am at work. It was quite hard to explain to my office-mate a very straight-laced Swede why I was laughing (especially since I haven’t told most people about my sims addiction… nobody in RL understands!).
Radomir is definitely growing as a character. He would never have behaved like this or noticed anything before. I think I need to get some kind of date system going like Lothere’s because it is hard to know how much time is passing in Mhalwae for you guys. I mean, Valeriya has been sick for a really long time. At first Radomir was only waiting because Hepsie told him he had to or he would seriously damage her. But while all that waiting has been going on he has been doing a lot of thinking. He is still Radomir but he is starting to realise that perhaps that isn’t such a good thing. And we are getting to know him a bit better and see that he does have some reasons for the way he is. It has been five months since Valeriya got bitten and nearly four months since she woke up. She has been really ill and I don’t think it is made better by the fact that she seems to have lost her will to live completely. So Radomir has been pretty damn good waiting around though it has obviously been an ongoing struggle for him. The old Radomir would never have behaved like that but almost losing her made him realise what he had to some extent I think. I also think he is trying hard not to hurt her again. What happened before with the baby really shocked him. And then what happened with Mella freaked him out too although he seems to have blocked that out to some extent, putting it down to too much drink. Remember also, they have not slept together since then as Valeriya sought protection from him. That was an entire year ago. I think things would have been very different though if she hadn’t almost died. He probably would have returned to his old ways. Who knows… he is always teetering on the brink… he may still. I don’t know but things are going to get messy soon that is one thing for sure.
However, Radomir is not the most perceptive person, especially when it comes to women. You guys are right about that. Well… actually, I rather think he has a blind spot with regard to himself. He can judge others for behaving in a similar way but he is not good at applying that to his own self. I think the only reason he picked up on Lyiss’ fear was that he had witnessed it with regard to Kelgar and he could see she was behaving the same way towards him. I think it was a lightbulb moment for him in a way. Maybe it will give him something to think about. Also, Lyiss has a very open face and is not good at hiding her expressions. He has always been terrible at interpreting Valeriya because she is always so closed off… to him and everybody else. Except Harndall I guess.
Anyways… I hope that makes things a bit more clear. I feel like if I had to explain so much I didn’t portray the things I wanted to well enough. Oh well… there is always next post to do better
And woah! Talk about monster comment!
I know I’m not exactly a neutral judge, but I don’t think Radomir’s development has been such a leap as to be unbelievable. For me, it has been a combination of his development as a character and his development as a person.
For the character, he started out as a very frightening black box — I don’t remember whether we ever saw his own POV, but even if we did, we didn’t know why he was the way he was or what he was thinking. And then one day we got this sudden, startling view into his head and his past.
I’m not saying we should forgive him everything because he had an abusive childhood (that’s another debate), just that that revelation already advanced his character in a big way. It may seem kind of a literary cliché, but in real life it so often happens that abusers are former victims of abuse, so it’s more of a sad-but-true.
Then — both gradually and in sudden leaps — Radomir’s own thought processes advanced. He and his wife have been through more than most ordinary dysfunctional couples ever do (vampires??), so I think he has had a good opportunity for introspection and to think about what it would mean if he lost Valeriya.
I hate to drag my own story into this but it’s become the only literary context I have left and I happen to share it with a lot of you
But Radomir reminds me of Dantalion, with this deep-lying, thwarted, blighted capacity for love (and undying desire for it), but the only way he knows how to interact with the world any more is through violence and terror. So it seems like Radomir has had his same realization that he can’t crush or strangle or smother or frighten Valeriya into loving him, and if he tries he is just going to lose her.
That is the one critical leap that he had to make, and if you accept that it is possible and that he did, then I think everything that has happened with Radomir afterwards is believable. In fact, Verity, I find you have done a very good job recently with writing him, showing him hesitating between his old instincts to crush and bite her — it even seems to be the only way he knows how to be affectionate — and his new, awkward, but very conscious and deliberate attempts to be gentle with her.
So OK maybe in my case it is the classic housewife fantasy of the Abuser being transformed by love, but hey, that’s what fiction is for. In RL I wouldn’t stand for Radomir. (I assume.)
And as for Tiana.
Is it appropriate to put quotes from other blogs’ comments into my own forum? Tiana needs a quote page of her own.
Verity, I have told my office mates about my story in an indirect way (it was mentioned in the company newsletter, illustrated with a cute image (which I did not pick, but good choice anyway) of Lar holding Seven.
) and they either seemed to shrug it off or find it rather cool. I am surprised people in a Uni setting don’t get it. Maybe because we are more of a technology / design / new media company, and because I framed it as a sort of 21st Century multi-media story-telling experiment, rather than “Wheeee! I play computer games on the weekend!” But I admit that laughing out loud at Tiana is more of a “Wheeeee!” activity, so if your office mate is straight-laced enough, maybe that would be hard to explain. Even if I would think that anyone who studies a crystal of salt all day requires some sort of “Wheeee!” on the weekend. (Don’t get me wrong — I do like salt. Couldn’t live without it, in fact. But it makes compiler-writing as a thesis topic seem like Wheeee!)
My monster comment eats monster comments like yours for a snack!
Also I don’t like that “things are going to get messy” comment at all. *worries*
Sorry for not replying sooner, this has been the absolute week from hell, an installment of the month from hell. I have to hand in the draft of my article to my supervisor tomorrow (but I crashed some time around 5 this arvo from working day and night for three weeks… I am all out of clever thoughts). And I ended up having to teach a whole lot of structural geology pracs (which I remembered pretty much nothing of) since someone cancelled at the last minute. Thank goodness it is over and I can blaaaaaa somewhat (or perhaps spend some wheeeeee! time).
Thanks so much for your monster quote Lothere. It means a lot to me that you are putting so much thought into interpreting my characters. He is rather a lot like Dantalion, both of them trying desperately to be loved, but being completely cruddy at the whole thing. I was trying to imagine what a conversation between them would be like and I think they would really hate each other. It is funny, but even though they are so similar I think they would each think the other was a really bad guy. Ah… these imagined conversations. Of course I don’t mind at all when you make comparisons with your story… I find it really interesting because I am so involved in reading Lothere too
and sometimes it gives me greater insight into how my characters are behaving. It is one of my major literary contexts right now too 
I don’t know why I can’t tell people at work. I just worry that they will think it is stupid. I guess because the people I have told (like some of my close friends) do think it is stupid. I wanted them to have a look at my site but I am pretty sure none of them did. I was talking to one of them about how I thought it was good writing practice because I would really love to be a writer one day and she said, “yeah, well why don’t you just write an online story without the sims”. I think she just doesn’t get it. I find it a lot more fun to write like this, and the characters become much more real and alive for me when I know what they really look like and when they make their own characters for themselves. It has helped my writing to no end because I used to find it very difficult to describe things and having a comic-type thing really helps. I think my writing has improved so much with this blog and I hope it will continue to do so. So I think it has been a massive step for me, because I would never have just written an online story without the sims. I wouldn’t have been able to do it without the sims, but maybe now, one day if I want to later I will be able to write a novel (though I may still make the characters in the sims
.
So this has been awesome for me. But I think they see at as silly wheeee playing games. Not that I am at all against playing games for wheeeee! purposes. Everyone has to have some time off dammit. It makes me so angry when you meet these people who think it is dumb to play computer games. And most of the people in my department go climbing and hiking on the weekends. Which I like doing sometimes but in general I am a more indoors, reading books and playing computer games or watching movies (or writing this blog) kind of girl. I personally think climbing is kind of dumb (at least the kind they do with a mat where you climb up a big boulder and then fall down. Actually I think it is called bouldering. I don’t think that sounds fun at all) but I don’t tell them that. Everybody has their own thing, why bag someone else out for theirs. Grrrr.
I did tell one guy at work, because I saw on his facebook that he played the sims and he is also a completely fantasy nerd like me (he is more into WOW though). He thought it was cool. I don’t know, he was the only person there who thought my jokes were funny (I don’t know think it is a language barrier I think maybe my sense of humour is to odd) and shared common interests with me apart from rocks (and to be honest, I don’t want to talk about rocks all day long as much as I love them). But he was only here on exchange so he went back to South Africa. He is coming back for another six months at the end of the year though, so hurrah, I will have someone at work I can talk to about the sims
.
It must be really nice to have people at your work think it is cool. I only just got my parents to start reading it (but I think that was more a trouble with following the timeline of a blog problem than anything else). I have started sending them email installments so they have no excuse
. Actually I really want to do some sort of send out email thing when there is an update to my readers. My boyf and I are just going to sit down and try and fix up the site and that is one of the things I really want to do. Yay… fixed site.
Tiana does need her own quote page
I don’t mind you using her quotes from this page if you want to. You make us all laugh so much Tiana. I really can’t get the picture of Radomir’s balls with one of those hand tear off lines that paper towels have out of my head. Arg! But so damn funny 
Oh my God I had the same mental image of Radomir’s balls with the perforations.
And Tiana just drying her hands on them and crumpling them up and throwing them away. Pfft! Watch out for that girl!
Sometimes I fantasize about your characters meeting mine too, weird as that sounds to all the rest of you. I am sure Dante would think Radomir is the worst kind of brute. Dantalion’s violence is much more studied and calculated. Which, in fact, makes it less excusable, but don’t tell him that.
What I would really like is for Eallair to have Sigefrith as a pen-pal. He could get so much good advice from him, except about women. Sigefrith and his axioms of diplomacy. Maybe Eallair could give him some advice about women while he’s at it. And I would just love to kidnap Cindra and keep her in my kingdom forever. What a team she would have made with Lili! I have imagined that too… Cindra and Lili and Sophie: the perfect storm.
My DH is one of the “computer games are dumb” kind of people so having the folks at work be cool with it is kind of a consolation prize. I personally don’t think that use of the Sims automatically trivializes the literary content, because for me it’s just a very sophisticated program for real-time generation of computer graphics that I can use to illustrate my story. Right?
(Never mind the whole world-building trip I have going on with a database of thousands of people and maps and randomized pregnancies and all that. The Sims game is just one small part of it really. But it has certainly brought my characters to life in a new way.)
I kind of understand people’s reactions, though, because I admit to having the same kind of “that’s not really writing” reaction to fan-fiction, which would no doubt anger some of my readers (hi readers who also read Mhalwae!). The cruelly judgmental part of me wants to say, if you were a real writer, couldn’t you make your own characters? (Frankly I don’t see how you can not.) There is something sort of parasitic about the medium, to me, or at least it feels like they’re using a crutch. But I can see how people would see my pictures as a crutch, so I try to shut the cruelly judgmental part of me up. I am aware of how limited my experience is — just because I would feel cheated somehow by writing someone else’s characters, doesn’t mean other people don’t find it a rich source of inspiration. And I am oh so painfully aware that people need to be allowed to do what they think is fun or else it isn’t fun! And my motto: If people read it and enjoy it, it can’t be wrong.
Too bad about your friends though. Now that I think about it, it is easier to tell people you semi-know, like coworkers, than actual friends.
I’ve been meaning to write about this subject on my forum, since Jade asked the question, so I’ll shut up now since I can’t edit my ill-conceived blathering here.
I know it is not very comforting when people who have the same madness as you tell you that you’re not crazy, but at least you know there are a few dozen people out there who consider this all quite proper and dignified. And we may yet have the last laugh.
I think a lot about our characters meeting and how they would interact (got to pass those boring hours heating my sample in the electron microscope somehow). I would totally love for Sigefrith and Eallair to be penpals. Eallair could really use some advice from a guy like Sigefrith. He is seriously in need of some good advice. I think they would be friends if they ever met, and that Sigefrith would take Eallair under his wing to some extent and help him be a better king. Awwww. Cindra, Lili and Sophie would have been the ultimate awesome! I think Cindra would have a lot of fun living in Lothere. More people to gossip about. I think she would really love Alred with his flamboyant flirtiness and his great sense of humour (but in a friends way). And I think she would get along with Cat really well too.
Sophisticated program and so on… I am so on board
Next time somebody tells me it’s silly I am totally going to tell them that. And what would it be without the world-building. I have been doing that since forever anyway (although I guess I didn’t really tell people I played DnD that much back in the day either 
I hate that people can be so judgmental. Dammit I am proud to be a nerd.
I guess with the people at my work I am sort of trying to ease them in gently. They know that I really like computer games and that I play the sims and read a lot of fantasy so far and I think they are starting to catch on that I am a massive nerd. Maybe one day I will spill the beans on my story. But I just can’t imagine my supervisor being that impressed with how I spend my spare time, even though she is really lovely and we get along great. She is just super-energetic and such and I am not.
I do see what you mean about fan-fiction. I have never written it but I have read it occasionally. The way I see it (but I don’t know if this is why people write it), is that people like the characters a lot but are sometimes frustrated with what the authors do with them. The only reason I can imagine writing something using another’s characters is if I really wanted the story to end a different way (usually happily). I don’t really understand it myself. But I do have a tendency to continue movies in my head to make them have a happy ending if I don’t like the way they end (I mean some movies are so sad!). Sometimes books too, if I am not satisfied with the end then I will make up what happens after so that it end the way I want it to (even though I really know it didn’t end that way). I think it comes from my need to have everything tied up neatly at the end (also the happy ending thing). It doesn’t always have to be happy but I hate it when it ends ambiguously. I have never written anything down though… it is just my strange imaginings. Maybe fan-fic writers just can’t bear the story ending and want the characters to continue on forever so they keep writing them when the story stops. I would hate to write with someone else’s characters though. I love writing my own.
I guess you are right about the semi-know verses the friend thing. Although I would like my friends to rally to my side. I don’t think everything they do is the best thing ever but I am generally supportive and interested in what they do. Meh. Actually, we should carry this on at your forum because I am sure lots of people would have opinions too and I think it is an interesting topic.
Maybe that’s the reaction I’m lacking that prevents me from understanding the allure of writing (or even reading) fan-fiction — I don’t think it can make up for an original author’s failures, nor continue his successes, in any way.
I’ve lamented before about how I can’t bear to see a favorite book or series end, which is why I liked Anne of Green Gables, etc., so much, and one of the reasons why I am writing my own ongoing story. But I have never even considered attempting to rewrite or continue a beloved story. It would not be real. I don’t think it would satisfy my craving at all.
But I know how that craving feels, so if there are people out there who are able to ease it by writing fan-fiction, then in that sense, I do totally understand. It just wouldn’t work for me. And I say that without any smugness.
However, I also think that I would do or at least say something Tiana-esque if I found out someone was writing my characters. That would just creep me out, at least until I got hardened to the fact. There is something Frankensteinish about the idea — like once you take my characters out of their natural habitant of my head, they instantly die… but then you want to go and animate them and make them walk around and say things they never said? It’s not real! And they’re mine dammit!
On another note, you played D&D?
I don’t think I knew that. If only you were a Star Trek fan you would be my kindred spirit!
That is one of the reasons I love this genre so much. I hate it when a book or series I love finishes and the way this is set up, it just keeps going. Of course one bad thing is we get to see the demise of some of our favourite characters but that in itself is very interesting.
I would find it really strange if someone started writing my characters. I would be very annoyed if I hadn’t said it was okay. I guess it would be flattering in a way but I don’t think I would be able to get over the weirdness. I feel like I am the one who knows them the best and if someone else started writing them it would just not work. They would make them into something different that wasn’t them. Although it would be kind of interesting to see what someone else made of them, but I think I get to see that already through people’s comments. Sometimes I get a comment that gives me a greater insight into one of the characters. But I think if someone was trying to write them it would just be all wrong for me. And I know what you mean. They are mine and I don’t want them leaving my headspace.
Yes I played D&D too! I am a huge roleplaying fan although I haven’t done it since I left Australia (I don’t have any friends here that do, although my boyf used to play vampire when he was younger). I guess actually that is one of the reasons I am writing this story, I get such a kick out of this world building stuff and I have no outlet for it in Sweden. I have tried playing a lot of different systems (I was in a roleplaying club and then a group that met once a week) like Marvel, Star wars, MiddleEarth, Vampire, Changeling and of course D&D. But D&D was were it all began and it has never stopped being my favourite. There is just such a great scope in that game. One thing I love about writing this story is that I get to have more than one character to play around with.
I am watching some Star Trek these days… I really like it so far though I need to get some more time to get into it. I always have the problem when things get to large, because I am a cover-to-cover person (ie if I read a magazine I start at the beginning and read the whole thing front to back. I have the same problem with reading scientific articles. It takes me forever because I can’t just skim through and pick out the important bits). So I feel like I have to start at the very beginning and work my way through but it is so enormous!