Morven cannot
She had been so focused on the internal workings of her body that she had not even noticed Alexis until he was right behind her. She had been trying to choose a book to read now that the babies were finally asleep. But the mere movement of lifting her arm to reach to the higher shelves had completely distracted from the task at hand. She was horrified that even with such a small effort her heart would beat sickeningly fast.
She slowly lowered her arm, the thumping in her chest increasing as Alexis languidly ran his hand down her side. Then he suddenly pressed his body desperately against the length of hers, pushing her up against the bookcase. She felt her body stiffen at his touch, her stomach churning and her mouth dry.
His hand found the hollow of her flank, lazily drawing circles over the spot that always made her stomach flutter. Today it did not flutter, but writhed and squirmed away from his touch. He firmly grasped her hipbone, deftly spinning her around his mouth finding hers.
The weight of his body pushed her against the bookcase with a thump and a small cloud of dust floated down around them. The things they had done here, her back to the bookcase, her skirt around her waist and now all she could think of were the wooden shelves jutting painfully into her spine and the dreadful constant pounding of her heart.
She waited for her body to respond to the yearnings in his, but she could only feel weak and sick in his grasping arms. She wondered if she fainted there in those arms would he catch her, or would she merely fall to the floor in a dishevlled heap. She felt dizzy, and in her desperation for air she had to push him away.
She stood for a moment, trying to hide the great gulping breaths she sucked in, almost choking on the dust.
After waiting a moment, Alexis moved in to kiss her again but she turned her face so he met with a cold cheek instead.
“What’s wrong Morven love”, he asked suddenly realising her lack of response might be reason for concern.
She couldn’t tell him, couldn’t let him know how ill she felt most days, how her heart beat rapidly at the slightest task. She didn’t want him to know that the mere act of holding Colthan or Riandur was too much for her weakened body, that when he lay her down at night sometimes the clenching pain was so great she felt she would die there in his arms.
“Oh nothing dear… I.. I’m just a bit tired is all”, she tried to smile, but could feel that the muscles in her face were not living up to her expectations, “I don’t think I’m really up to it right now. You know how those boys of ours are keeping me awake”.
“It took me so long to put them to sleep now, it would be a shame to wake them with all our moaning and groaning and hollering”, Morven thought she was doing a better job with the smiling but it nearly fell from her face at the thought of what she had lost.
Alexis was still looking at her, concern flickering across his face in the green light from her father’s lamp. He rubbed gently at her rigid arm. She would have to do better.
She gently pushed away his hand, “Oh look at you there with your poor eyebrows knotted like that. If you’re not careful, worrying about me is going to give you wrinkles. I’m fine, really, just a little tired that’s all”.
That did the trick as Alexis’ attention was suddenly focused on the dreadful possiblity of wrinkles creasing his handsome face. He rubbed vigourously at the spot between his brows and by the time he turned back to her Morven had managed to compose her face in to a much more realistic semblance of a smile.
“You run along then, I’m sure you’ve got better things to do than stay here and watch me read and feed the babies”.
He grinned at her, “Well I wouldn’t mind watching the feeding part. But you’re right, I guess I should go and see how things are going with the church”.
He gently stroked her under her chin, “Alright then kitten, we’ll just have to make up for it another time”.
He pulled her towards him and kissed her. Then he was off, striding towards the door, humming to himself as he clicked out a rhythm with his fingers.
She continued to smile until he had closed the door and she had heard the sound of his footsteps clomping off down the hallway.
The smile cracked and fell from her face slithering to the floor as she slid wearily down the bookcase into a crumpled heap. She would have cried but it seemed like too much effort to her sputtering heart and so she sat there, leaning heavily against the bookcase, her knees pulled towards her face and arms resting limply at her sides.
He would go and he would find another woman as he always did. She had nothing left to offer him.
Ugh, that left me feeling a little sick myself. Alexis’s insouciance is part of his charm, but we really see it at its most heartless extremes here. Poor Morven is practically dying in his arms, and although he finally starts to notice something is wrong, she distracts him with nothing more than a jab at his vanity.
And then he goes strolling off (doing that finger-snapping walk I just love — I crack up every time Paul does it)… “to see how things are going with the church.” Yeah sure you are!
Of course you could always do a follow-up chapter where he goes to the church and breaks down in tearful prayers for his wife’s health. And if you do I will be glad I was wrong about him. But I think Morven knows him best. Except for you, of course, Verity, so feel free to prove us both wrong.
So what is wrong with Morven, anyway? Those are such worrying symptoms, it seems like much more than fatigue from caring for twins. And that is one of the worst feelings in the world, when you just don’t want to anymore. Except maybe when you are a man and you just can’t. But something tells me Alexis doesn’t have that problem, so Morven has all my pity at the moment.
I think I’m going to wish it on him.
Oh, wow. I loved this part… loved. I especially loved how well you depicted the scene between the two of them. Poor Morven… is she sickly or just weary from the childbirth? I hope there’s nothing truly wrong with her. She’s such an interesting girl… and to deal with Alexis! She has to be quite strong willed, too.
Alexis’ flippant attitude is perfectly played out here. Really fantastic all the way around. It left me feeling very sad for the both of them, but especially Morven. The realization at the end was the crux of it all.
Hi. As much as I am annoyed with Alex for not paying much attention to the fact that something’s wrong with his wife I don’t think that Morven should’ve just brushed his concerns away though. Surely Alex would at least try to take care of her.
Keep Simming!.
See ya.
Alexis isn’t the most observant guy as you’ve all noticed. He’s not totally unfeeling but he just isn’t that in tune with other people’s feelings. And Morven knows him well and is clever enough to know exactly how to distract him from pestering her. The thing is, right now she could really do with some pestering but Alexis is too silly to push the issue. He would try and take care of her if he knew but his thoughts are generally mostly focused on himself so it is hard for him to realise when other people need him.
It isn’t just fatigue from the twins but I’m not going to say more at this point. And there will be a follow up chapter about Alexis in a couple of posts but prepare to be disappointed… he isn’t doing much of that old church-praying.
I felt horrible for Morven in this chapter. That really is the worst feeling in the world. It is one thing to want to but be unable to for various reasons, but losing the want to full stop is so much worse.
Well you can hardly blame the poor girl for not wanting it anymore. Got her in quite the predicament last time and she almost died. But I bet she is feeling miserable for not doing it with her husband and knowing he’ll just go somewhere else. You portrayed his personality with his looks perfectly Verity. With the cheesy mustache and the long hair. He’s not French is he? Bleh. I didn’t like him from the moment I saw him cause of his appearance! That’s bad I know but he just reeked cheesy womanizer. I guess that was your plan though.
Oh and btw I don’t know if your subscribed but I put another post up on Soaghal, finally!
Poor, poor Morven. She sure has been through the ringer. Great update, I can’t wait till the next one!
I love Alexis’ cheesy moustache! You can just picture him carefully shaping it every morning in the mirror. And it really is such a puny little thing.
There is technically no France since it is a made-up world, although I am using the languages from the real-world since I am really bad at making up stuff like that. So there is a country in the world that is sort-of based on France and they speak French there but Alexis is not from there. He does come from Branwhuld the country they had to abandon as do most of the characters. Some of their parents are from different countries but as far as I have thought it out now (and I might change it slightly) the only characters who definitely come from elsewhere are Madlenka and Nyawe (a new character in the next post!), who are both from Lomorrad a neighbouring country.
I’m off to check out your new post!
I think Morven has some sort of heart condition. I’m surprised that no one else has voiced that same thought.
That’s very shrewd of you Lisa *those shifty Lotherian eyes*.