As always when they happened to be going to bed at the same time, they went to their respective beds, not even saying goodnight to each other.

Cordell sat on the edge of the bed, purposefully looking at Lisbet as she tucked herself into bed. He was desperate to start a fight. Things had been very different between them since he had woken from his coma two weeks before. Where there had been a plethora of screaming and yelling before now there was only silence. And he could not bear the silence. Anything would have been better than this.

Lisbet rolled over and was soon sleeping soundly, but sleep would not visit him tonight. It was not the pain of his wounds, which were slowly healing, although it seemed his face would be marked with a scar permanently now. No, it was a different pain, a pain pounding in his heart, making him dizzy and sick. He felt light-headed as he stood, supporting himself on the bedpost so he did not fall.

He silently crept to her bedside so he could see her sleeping face, lit by the golden candlelight. Her features were soft, but he could not help but notice how sorrowful they were even in sleep. It also occured to him that she wore her hair differently now when she slept, she had forcefully tied it back, although large pieces fell around her face refusing to be tamed. Her mouth was open slightly, her cheeks flushed pink with sleep. Cordell longed to feel the touch of those soft lips on his, to rub his face against those warm cheeks. It was too much to bear.

He gently shook her awake, thinking dolefully of all the times she had not been so polite in raising him from his sleep. She mumbled and stirred, rolling towards him, her eyes blinking sleepily. When her eyes met his, he noticed they widened slightly, a look of suprise clearly written on her face.

She pulled the covers back as he stood watching her. How had he never before noticed the way the folds of her flimsy, white nightgown clung to the curves beneath. His heart was thumping in his chest so loudly now he felt sure she must have heard it.

If she did she gave no sign, carefully smoothing the hair that had broke free of its confines back into place.

She put her hands on her hips the way she used to before a fight but all the fire had gone out of it, leaving only the glow of deadening coals.

“What do you want Cordell?”, she sighed deeply, her hair falling in front of her face again. This time she did not try to straighten it as though the effort was too much.

He searched her face for some sign that the passionate, angry woman he had married was still inside there, anything but this marionette standing before him. Had she really changed so much in the weeks he had been ill. He had only now realised that though fire could burn if you stood too close, or tried to smother it with your hands, it could also warm and comfort if you let it flicker. Now he feared that the fire had gone out.

She was staring at him, her eyes still dull from sleep and he suddenly realised how close his hand was to touching hers and with a burst of courage he reached out and took it.

She pulled it away as though he had burnt it. He looked at her face searching for some anger at his actions but saw none there, only confusion and sadness.

After gazing at each other for some moments, she finally spoke, “Cordell… I am tired… can you let me go back to sleep”.

She said it with a half-laugh, but there was no joy in it and it sounded hollow to his ears. She started to move back towards the bed.

In a moment of clarity Cordell realised that this was it, his last chance, after this there would be nothing. All of the heat of the fire would be gone, the coals too cold for any kindling to relight them.

He reached for her, pulling her firmly into his arms, so the entire length of their bodies was pressed together. He could feel her trembling against him, her breath coming out ragged between parted lips, her pupils dilated. His mouth was so close to hers he could almost taste those lips.

“Cordell… let me go”, she said but there was no resolution behind her shaking voice, “I am tired”.

She stared at him, and he finally saw the flicker of a small spark of defiance behind her gaze, as though she was daring him to comply. It was enough and he tilted her back so far that she had to cling to him to stay upright, his mouth hungrily finding hers. She kissed him back with a passion equaling his and he felt the fire flare up between them.

She moaned as he nipped at the soft skin of her neck, her fingernails digging into his back as she fought to stay upright. He could feel her nightgown riding up her leg and he was suddenly desperate for the material that separated them to be gone.

He turned her around and began to untie the laces of her gown.

“It should be my ladies doing that for me”, she joked, though he could hear her voice shaking.

It reminded him of their actual wedding night when he had found she had dressed herself again after her ladies had left, and had refused to let him touch her.

It also reminded him that he had never seen her naked body before and he pulled frantically at the laces. It should not have been so difficult but his fingers were nervously fumbling and he felt like cheering when finally her gown slid to the floor. He was quickly distracted from his small victory by the sight of her.

She was no longer laughing as he stood behind her so close she could feel his hot breath on the back of her neck. His hands caressed her sides, slowly moving down to rest on her hips.

“Cordell,” she whispered, the tiniest sound he had ever heard from her, “I am very sorry”.

“Me too Lisbet… for everything”, he gently turned her around kissing her deeply, her hair falling over their faces.

He maneuvered her over to the bed and gently laid her down, still kissing her, his hand stroking the smooth curve of her thigh. Her arms were wrapped around his waist and he found himself not quite believing this could actually be happening.

He stopped for a moment, looking searchingly at her face, but he saw there no hostility, only warmth and the hint of something else. He was not able to ponder what that might be as she grasped a fistful of his hair in her hand and pulled his mouth to hers, kissing him fiercely.

He gently moved inside her, kissing her hard to distract her from the pain. He felt her arms tighten around his back, then go soft as she relaxed letting him in.

“Lisbet”, he murmured softly in her ear, “Now we truly are married”.

The pain was great for Lisbet but so was the pleasure as she hugged her husband to her, tears running uncontrollably down her face.

“I love you Lisbet”, he managed to say between ragged gasps, “I love you… I love you so much. I thought I was dead and I would never be with you but then you saved me from the dark”.

“I love you too Cordell”, was all she could reply but it was more than enough.